It's over! (Almost)

The court hearing went well...or I guess I should say it went how we needed it to. Now we wait. You have to wait for 30 days after the hearing for it to be official. We had a difficult defense attorney who added ten days onto that so we have 40 days to wait. This is 40 BUSINESS days. Nice, right? Mid April we should be official. I feel like I can finally breathe again!

Almost there!

Tomorrow, March 7th, is the last court hearing for Little A. They will be terminating his "dads" rights. We wait for thirty days for it to become official and then we get to file for adoption. I never thought this date would get here! I am usually a basket case right before every court date but I have great peace about this hearing and the truth will come to light about the interaction that A has had with his dad. God  has been so gracious to us!

Answered Prayers!

No matter how hard I try to be more consistent with posting on here I keep failing. Not that any of you are waiting anxiously for my updates. :)
We have some good news! We are halfway to being able to call little A ours forever. Please don't stop praying! We have a few more things to get through in the beginning to March and then hopefully if all goes well we can make the big announcement.

Lauren

For once I am not blogging about the drama of foster care! I just wanted to give you all an update on Lauren and her Epilepsy.
We had noticed that this past school year has been a bit more challenging and that she was having some focus/concentration issues. She seemed to be distracted a lot. We met with her neurologist at the beginning of January and he seemed to think that she might have ADD. Of course he wanted to put her on medication right then. I said no way! We decided to wait and see what her EEG said. If her EEG came back that she was having "breakthrough" seizures throughout the day that could have more to do with her focus problems.Even though she doesn't know that she is having a seizure she will tend to lose her place if she is reading or concentrating.She can't tell you why she is distracted because she doesn't know she just had a seizure.   If it came back that she wasn't having any seizure activity then ADD was probably to blame. Well, yesterday we got the results and it showed that she was definitely having some abnormal seizure activity which means that she is having breakthrough seizures even though she is on a medication to control them. They don't want to adjust her medication at this point because there is a limit to how much of the medication she can have in her system. We just have to deal with it for the time being.  ADD would be so much easier to treat! The hard part is trying be a good teacher and for both of us to be good parents to her through something that she has no control over and that effects everything she does. God has given this to her for a reason and we have to accept that and know that He knows best!

It continues

So, neither parent showed up for their conference today so now we wait until March to have their rights terminated. So tired of waiting....

Thoughts:

This is from another blog that I subscribe to.  Paul and I have struggled with this too many times and it was comforting to read someone else's perspective: 

I write this with incredible sensitivity in my heart.

In London in 2008, while I was going to school, my wife and I lost our first child, our son Adam, through miscarriage. This experience was devastating—our faith was rocked. It sent us into a season of asking innumerable questions of God: Could we go on? Is God good? Can he be trusted with our lives being that Adam’s was lost? Does he even care?

Even today, we are affected by our loss. Today, Adam would be five years old. Many of you know what this is like. There is an empty chair at our dinner table every night, birthdays that go by, and imagined holidays and experiences that are left only to the imagination of what could have been.

We are left to speculation, but our speculation doesn’t go unenlightened.

As a pastor, I am often asked what happens to babies like ours who are lost in miscarriage or to children who are killed through abortion. The one thing we do know is that they, like all of us, are image bearers of God who came into existence, even though they never had the joy of being loved, kissed, and cherished by their earthly mom and dad. 

Where do the unborn babies go? Some would argue that they don’t go to heaven because we are sinful beings and the only way to be reconciled to God is through faith and repentance. Since these babies didn’t repent or have faith, they are forever separated from God in hell. Others argue that Jesus died for the world and therefore those children who are born in Adamic guilt have their sins atoned for because they haven’t committed personal sin. 

The reality is that Scripture never speaks directly to this situation. At this point we are left to speculation, but our speculation doesn’t go unenlightened. We have a perfect Bible that reveals ultimately what God desires for us to know. Since there is not a verse (much less a systematic theology) on this subject, it seems only right to appeal to the character and nature of the God in whose image humans are created.

I abide in the great comforter, the Holy Spirit.

God has revealed himself as holy, just, and righteous—but that’s not all. He’s revealed himself as the definition of love (1 John 4:8), whose grace is scandalous, (Luke 15:11–32), and whose mercy leads to our justification (Rom. 2:4). In fact, Jesus teaches us that he is our heavenly Father (Matt. 6:7–15) and Paul goes as far as to tell us on two occasions that God prefers his kids use a familial name like “Abba” when talking to him in prayer (Rom. 8:15; Gal. 4:16).

Though I don’t have a verse that says definitively that our boy Adam is in heaven with Jesus along with millions of other children, when I look at the nature and character of our God, who was born in a barn (Luke 2:1–20) washed the feet of his betrayer (John 13:1–17), unashamedly befriended outcasts of society (Matt. 11:19), forgave and restored dignity to a woman caught in adultery (John 8:1–11), and suffered so that he might end our suffering (Isa. 53:5), was raised to give us justification (Rom. 4:25), is building a home for us in heaven (John 14:3), is praying for us even now (Rom. 8:34), and is coming to take us to be with him forever (John 14:3), where he is the hero who wipes away every tear from every eye (Rev. 21:4).

I abide in the great comforter, the Holy Spirit, knowing that my baby met this God face to face, and therefore, I have great hope of one day worshiping Jesus at Adam’s side.

Procrastination.

So, our computer was down for awhile, but, yes, procrastination is my main excuse here! Here is the Little A update: We are closer to being able to call him ours forever. There is a conference this week on Thursday with bio parents attorney's and our caseworker. They are going to ask the parents to sign over their parental rights and if they don't sign over then the final termination hearing is in the beginning of March. Every thing is always slow going when you are dealing with the state. Praying that this really will be over soon! I will update you all again when I find out what happens later this week.

Holding Steady...

It's been almost a month so I suppose you all might want to know what's been goin' on! Well, from the last post you knew that Baby K was most likely going to live with her biological father. This took place Sept. 6th. I think that God prepared my heart by giving me a few weeks to get used it. Now it's just a matter of trust that God will protect and His plan is perfect. Little A is still with us. He is having visits with his "dad." My prayer is that this man would just volunteer his rights and sign A over to us. We'll see what God has in store...
This week has been a bit rough. We are trying to get back into the routine after Lauren had her tonsils out two weeks ago. It was not fun! The excitement for her was that she turned seven last week and that made up for the week and half of not being able to eat very much.I wish that I could post pictures up but I am not sure how to get them off my phone and onto here.
Anyway, Monday a client of mine ended up with a c-section due to some difficult circumstances. It's always hard when things like this happen because my job is to make sure that they feel positive about their birth experience. It was a bummer of a day.
Then Tuesday night someone form Lauren's ballet school backed into the side of our van. Thankfully, they have insurance. It's only Wednesday and I feel like we need to just lock ourselves in the house for the rest of the week!

Hangin' on...

I hadn't realized that it had been so long. I feel as if we have lived a whole life time with all that has been going on this summer.
Let me start with Lauren: She is amazing! We are in our third week of third grade. She is working really hard and is having fun. I switched home schooling material this year and I am so glad that I did. Her learning style is much different now since we have all the basics (reading, writing, addition, etc..) down now. She has started ballet again. Both of us are involved in a Thursday morning Bible Study. We both have teaching sessions and our homework to get done during the week.. She loves meeting all the kids in her class and having some social time.
Baby A: Well, on July 12th we ended up having his baby sister, Baby K, placed in our home. She is beautiful and sweet. This past week we found out that she will be going to live with her biological father. All we can do is pray God's protection over her and her future. This is the hardest part about foster care is sending them back into what you know are less than ideal situations.
The day after we found out about Baby K we received news that Baby A has a dad and that dad would like custody of him. The dad has not been involved in the year since he has been born and has now decided that he would like a chance. According to the rules of child protective services they have to give him a chance to prove himself. So long story short, we are in a holding pattern of sorts to see if Baby A's future is with us or with his dad. This is another situation where we pray for God's will and protection and try not to be selfish in our own heart's desires.

Chuggin' along

A friend of my posted this earlier: "Whatever is in front of me let me sing Hallelujah."  I feel as if I have been thinking this for the past ten months...

Life is normal. Nothing major going on. I love it! Enjoying reading programs at the library, art classes for Lauren and lot's of playing. We have to be so scheduled during the school year that it's nice to just be able to sit back and let the day go where it wants.
Little A is walking and has proven himself to be very busy and very active from the moment he wakes to the moment he closes his eyes. I have forgotten how busy this age is. He will be a year old next month. Praying for the day that I can plaster his little face on here for you all to see!

Praises!

Ellie turns a year old today! Thank you to all who have been praying. She came through surgery really well. They went in thinking that the cancer had spread from the bladder to her uterus and surrounding girl parts. Praise God that when they biopsied the tissue from those areas they came out tumor free. So no hysterectomy! She has a long road of healing, but seems to be doing really well my sister in law has said. She will have to start the chemo back up soon and finish it  before they go back to rebuild the bladder, Please don't stop praying!

We are getting ready to go to Branson to see my parents for the weekend. I am very glad to be able to catch my breath even if it is only for a few days. When we are home all of the issues that we are facing with foster care are right there in front of our faces. When we get to go away for a few days we can just forget about it for a little while. I hope you all have a great Memorial Day weekend!

Bittersweetness

Is bittersweetness even a word? Well, it is now! It completely describes our feelings of the week. We had  to go to court for little A on Thursday morning. I can't share a whole lot except that the judge made a really good ruling in our favor. The hard part in this is that the battle is just now starting. There is another person that wants to have guardianship and the state is also still trying to figure out paternity and rule out the many different potential fathers. It's a mess and it could take a long time to sort this out. Paul and I are clinging to the fact the judge saw through birth moms lies. We pray that the judge continues to see through them. We still have little A and that means something.

Please pray for little Ellie tomorrow. She is having her bladder removed and they are going to explore to see if anything else needs to be removed. My brother is having to go on a business trip this week and can't be there for the surgery. Please pray for my sister in law as she goes through this week without her husband.

Ellie

http://carryingellie.blogspot.com/     This is a the link to my sister in law's blog. I mentioned in an earlier post that my niece was diagnosed with cancer back in March. It would take me forever to explain all that is going on so please go to their blog and read it. There are a lot of challenges in their way. I am asking you to put Ellie on your prayer list and please commit to praying for their family.

The past few weeks...

It has been almost a month since I have updated you all! I'm so sorry. I get so caught up trying to get through the day that I forget that there are some people that might like to know what is going on.

So first I need to start off with a funny story from yesterday. On the way home from the Dr.'s office I almost hit a squirrel. Lauren starts going on about how we can't hit all the animals because if we do there won't be any left and we can't have a world without animals. A few minutes later she started crying and said "Mommy, God can't make anymore! Yes, even though my child was crying I did laugh (just a little!) I love the mind of a six year old!  (No, we did not go into animal reproduction at this point.)

Paul's job is going well. Good hours and pretty stress free.We see each other more.  If he is not working 15 hours a day than anything less than that is good for us! The kids go to sleep pretty early so I am still trying to get used to the evenings by myself. Actually, my issue is trying to use that time productively. I could get totally sucked into watching T.V. all night. I am so grateful that God has provided for our family and my husband is much happier! No complaining!

I wish I could post pictures of little A. You would love him! Right now he has a case of hand, foot and mouth disease. These past couple days have not been very happy. He is miserable and there is nothing you can do except give him Tylonol. Plus he is teething....should I go on?  Anyway, I brought him up because we have a court date in two weeks. Please pray for peace and that the judge would find favor with us. My scripture of encouragement lately is Isaiah 55:8-9 where it talks about how God's plans are not our plans and we just have to trust that His plan is better. Everything looks like it is pointing towards A staying with us, but the judge can do whatever she pleases. A is still in our home, so that means something. I had someone ask me recently what the hardest thing about foster care was. It's ALL hard...slightly kidding!...seriously, it's the family's of these kids. I grew up in such a wonderful home that I look at some of the situations and I think.."No, way! It can't be that bad!" Well, I found out that it is that bad and sometimes much worse. You can't have any expectations of people when you are fostering. Sorry, I went off on little side note there! Please be praying!

Adjustments

Paul started a new job today. We have been praying for a new job for awhile. Things with UPS were getting crazy and we had absolutely no family time. So, a few weeks ago God answered our prayer and he was offered a position with a really good distribution company on the south side of Louisville. The bittersweet part about this job is that he will be going back to working nights after he gets through with his orientation. Night shift isn't bad. I'm not complaining. It's the adjustment for Lauren and doing the whole dinner/bedtime thing alone every weeknight. We have done it before and I know that it will be ok. It's the getting through the adjustment part that I am dreading. My prayer for Paul is that this new job will be less stressful. God is control!

Update on foster care: Baby A is growing like a weed and is a really happy, well adjusted little boy. Our next court date is in May. We really aren't sure what is going to happen. They are still trying find and do paternity tests on two potential fathers. In the midst of all of this, birth mom is getting ready to have another baby in the next few weeks. Prayers are that they take this baby or that she really has straightened up and can parent this time. It is a day by day journey around here!