Holding Steady...

It's been almost a month so I suppose you all might want to know what's been goin' on! Well, from the last post you knew that Baby K was most likely going to live with her biological father. This took place Sept. 6th. I think that God prepared my heart by giving me a few weeks to get used it. Now it's just a matter of trust that God will protect and His plan is perfect. Little A is still with us. He is having visits with his "dad." My prayer is that this man would just volunteer his rights and sign A over to us. We'll see what God has in store...
This week has been a bit rough. We are trying to get back into the routine after Lauren had her tonsils out two weeks ago. It was not fun! The excitement for her was that she turned seven last week and that made up for the week and half of not being able to eat very much.I wish that I could post pictures up but I am not sure how to get them off my phone and onto here.
Anyway, Monday a client of mine ended up with a c-section due to some difficult circumstances. It's always hard when things like this happen because my job is to make sure that they feel positive about their birth experience. It was a bummer of a day.
Then Tuesday night someone form Lauren's ballet school backed into the side of our van. Thankfully, they have insurance. It's only Wednesday and I feel like we need to just lock ourselves in the house for the rest of the week!

Hangin' on...

I hadn't realized that it had been so long. I feel as if we have lived a whole life time with all that has been going on this summer.
Let me start with Lauren: She is amazing! We are in our third week of third grade. She is working really hard and is having fun. I switched home schooling material this year and I am so glad that I did. Her learning style is much different now since we have all the basics (reading, writing, addition, etc..) down now. She has started ballet again. Both of us are involved in a Thursday morning Bible Study. We both have teaching sessions and our homework to get done during the week.. She loves meeting all the kids in her class and having some social time.
Baby A: Well, on July 12th we ended up having his baby sister, Baby K, placed in our home. She is beautiful and sweet. This past week we found out that she will be going to live with her biological father. All we can do is pray God's protection over her and her future. This is the hardest part about foster care is sending them back into what you know are less than ideal situations.
The day after we found out about Baby K we received news that Baby A has a dad and that dad would like custody of him. The dad has not been involved in the year since he has been born and has now decided that he would like a chance. According to the rules of child protective services they have to give him a chance to prove himself. So long story short, we are in a holding pattern of sorts to see if Baby A's future is with us or with his dad. This is another situation where we pray for God's will and protection and try not to be selfish in our own heart's desires.

Chuggin' along

A friend of my posted this earlier: "Whatever is in front of me let me sing Hallelujah."  I feel as if I have been thinking this for the past ten months...

Life is normal. Nothing major going on. I love it! Enjoying reading programs at the library, art classes for Lauren and lot's of playing. We have to be so scheduled during the school year that it's nice to just be able to sit back and let the day go where it wants.
Little A is walking and has proven himself to be very busy and very active from the moment he wakes to the moment he closes his eyes. I have forgotten how busy this age is. He will be a year old next month. Praying for the day that I can plaster his little face on here for you all to see!

Praises!

Ellie turns a year old today! Thank you to all who have been praying. She came through surgery really well. They went in thinking that the cancer had spread from the bladder to her uterus and surrounding girl parts. Praise God that when they biopsied the tissue from those areas they came out tumor free. So no hysterectomy! She has a long road of healing, but seems to be doing really well my sister in law has said. She will have to start the chemo back up soon and finish it  before they go back to rebuild the bladder, Please don't stop praying!

We are getting ready to go to Branson to see my parents for the weekend. I am very glad to be able to catch my breath even if it is only for a few days. When we are home all of the issues that we are facing with foster care are right there in front of our faces. When we get to go away for a few days we can just forget about it for a little while. I hope you all have a great Memorial Day weekend!

Bittersweetness

Is bittersweetness even a word? Well, it is now! It completely describes our feelings of the week. We had  to go to court for little A on Thursday morning. I can't share a whole lot except that the judge made a really good ruling in our favor. The hard part in this is that the battle is just now starting. There is another person that wants to have guardianship and the state is also still trying to figure out paternity and rule out the many different potential fathers. It's a mess and it could take a long time to sort this out. Paul and I are clinging to the fact the judge saw through birth moms lies. We pray that the judge continues to see through them. We still have little A and that means something.

Please pray for little Ellie tomorrow. She is having her bladder removed and they are going to explore to see if anything else needs to be removed. My brother is having to go on a business trip this week and can't be there for the surgery. Please pray for my sister in law as she goes through this week without her husband.

Ellie

http://carryingellie.blogspot.com/     This is a the link to my sister in law's blog. I mentioned in an earlier post that my niece was diagnosed with cancer back in March. It would take me forever to explain all that is going on so please go to their blog and read it. There are a lot of challenges in their way. I am asking you to put Ellie on your prayer list and please commit to praying for their family.

The past few weeks...

It has been almost a month since I have updated you all! I'm so sorry. I get so caught up trying to get through the day that I forget that there are some people that might like to know what is going on.

So first I need to start off with a funny story from yesterday. On the way home from the Dr.'s office I almost hit a squirrel. Lauren starts going on about how we can't hit all the animals because if we do there won't be any left and we can't have a world without animals. A few minutes later she started crying and said "Mommy, God can't make anymore! Yes, even though my child was crying I did laugh (just a little!) I love the mind of a six year old!  (No, we did not go into animal reproduction at this point.)

Paul's job is going well. Good hours and pretty stress free.We see each other more.  If he is not working 15 hours a day than anything less than that is good for us! The kids go to sleep pretty early so I am still trying to get used to the evenings by myself. Actually, my issue is trying to use that time productively. I could get totally sucked into watching T.V. all night. I am so grateful that God has provided for our family and my husband is much happier! No complaining!

I wish I could post pictures of little A. You would love him! Right now he has a case of hand, foot and mouth disease. These past couple days have not been very happy. He is miserable and there is nothing you can do except give him Tylonol. Plus he is teething....should I go on?  Anyway, I brought him up because we have a court date in two weeks. Please pray for peace and that the judge would find favor with us. My scripture of encouragement lately is Isaiah 55:8-9 where it talks about how God's plans are not our plans and we just have to trust that His plan is better. Everything looks like it is pointing towards A staying with us, but the judge can do whatever she pleases. A is still in our home, so that means something. I had someone ask me recently what the hardest thing about foster care was. It's ALL hard...slightly kidding!...seriously, it's the family's of these kids. I grew up in such a wonderful home that I look at some of the situations and I think.."No, way! It can't be that bad!" Well, I found out that it is that bad and sometimes much worse. You can't have any expectations of people when you are fostering. Sorry, I went off on little side note there! Please be praying!

Adjustments

Paul started a new job today. We have been praying for a new job for awhile. Things with UPS were getting crazy and we had absolutely no family time. So, a few weeks ago God answered our prayer and he was offered a position with a really good distribution company on the south side of Louisville. The bittersweet part about this job is that he will be going back to working nights after he gets through with his orientation. Night shift isn't bad. I'm not complaining. It's the adjustment for Lauren and doing the whole dinner/bedtime thing alone every weeknight. We have done it before and I know that it will be ok. It's the getting through the adjustment part that I am dreading. My prayer for Paul is that this new job will be less stressful. God is control!

Update on foster care: Baby A is growing like a weed and is a really happy, well adjusted little boy. Our next court date is in May. We really aren't sure what is going to happen. They are still trying find and do paternity tests on two potential fathers. In the midst of all of this, birth mom is getting ready to have another baby in the next few weeks. Prayers are that they take this baby or that she really has straightened up and can parent this time. It is a day by day journey around here!

Mourning the early years...

So, this is going to sound  rather dumb, but my daughter is growing up. We are only three years away from the "tween" years.  She is starting to develop deeper friendships with her friends. I wish I could turn her back into a baby! I decided that I better darn well start preparing myself. Here is what I found that I have thoroughly enjoyed reading and wish that I had started reading when she was younger. It's a lot more than just having "the talk" with your daughter. Both books focus on helping them develop healthy friendships, modesty, helping them to have healthy play while they are little so they will learn how to make good decisions. For so long we felt  helpless in so many areas when it came to parenting a girl.  These books were and still are very helpful!

Busyness and other things

The past month has been crazy! My mom had a knee replacement so Lauren, the baby,  and I went out to Branson to help her for a few weeks. While we were gone Paul got an emergency foster care care placement for a few days. Thankfully everything turned out really well and he is back home with his mom. Amazed at my husband for taking care of a three year old little boy by himself for three days! No that I doubted his ability, it's just that most husbands wouldn't volunteer to do it! Anyway, things are finally calming down a bit and we are trying to get back into our school routine. I have a prayer request for you: While we were in Branson we found out that my nine month old niece has been diagnosed with a rare cancer called rahbdomyo sarcoma. She is going to be undergoing chemo and radiation soon. She has a lot of extenuating circumstances that would take too long to go into, but needless to say she has had a tough go of it since she was born and now she is dealing with this. Please just lift her up in your prayers.  Her name is Ellie.

Anxiousness

I haven't posted on here lately because I haven't had the words to share what has been going on. Long story short...there are a few people that want Baby A to be placed with them. Tomorrow Paul and I have a meeting with them and our caseworker to pretty much just lay it out and fight for what we believe is best for this little guy.    My prayer is that God's will be done. This is not about what our family wants, but it's about what is best for him. Even though God's will may not be pretty or end happily on our end, it is what is best for us. So, tomorrow we have our meeting and then next week we have a court date where the judge will decide placement.  Here is what has been laid on my heart the last few days:  "Your thoughts are not my thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts."  Isaiah 55:8-9

Encouragement

I borrowed this from a blog that I follow. I needed to read this today. 

30

JAN

When Life is Hard

2012 at 3:18 pm   |   by Carolyn Mahaney
Filed under Biblical Womanhood SufferingI love Scripture's honesty. I love how the biblical authors, inspired by the Holy Spirit, don't hold back about despair, weakness, doubt, or fear. They don't step gingerly around topics of pain or temptation or trouble. They are frank about the fact that life is hard.

So when the biblical writers speak to us of hope and joy and peace, we know these are real too. And in our depths of despair, we can take their hand and follow them out of the pit.

Take for example, the words of Jeremiah in Lamentations 3 that we are all so familiar with: "The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness" (v. 22-23). These words are spoken from the heights, a spectacular panorama. But how do we get there when we feel crippled by the trials of life? 

The same way Jeremiah did.

Only a few verses earlier he writes from the deepest valley: "...my soul is bereft of peace; I have forgotten what happiness is; so I say, 'My endurance has perished; so has my hope from the Lord'" (v. 17-18).

Can you relate? Hope, gone. Peace, gone. Happiness, so far gone, you can't even remember what it feels like. What do we say to someone who confesses this? Do we recoil at their lack of faith? And yet here is Jeremiah, prophet of God, confessing that in his trouble he feels bereft of all of the blessings of the people of God.

Then Jeremiah shows us how he gets from the depths to the heights: "But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope..." (v. 21).

His soul, which had taken its last breath of hope, was resuscitated by calling to mind who God is and what He does. He is faithful. He shows mercy, He does love. He does notforget. He sent His only Son who endured the agony of the cross, in our place and for our sins, and rose again, victorious. This I call to mind.

Notice that Jeremiah's trial was unchanged. He didn't get a phone call that the cancer was gone. He didn't find his enemies on his front porch asking for forgiveness. He didn't get hired. His child didn't become a Christian. But he had something better.

He had hope. Hope that one day, even if it wasn't until heaven, he would know happiness again

Home

Here are a few pictures from our trip to the Coast. We had a nice time visiting family and friends.  It was wonderful to not have to worry about anything for a week! 

This is the laundry detergent that I made before we left. I made my own a few years ago, but didn't like it, but this is a new recipe and so far it has been fabulous. It cost me $15 to make and you only use one tablespoon per load. This jar should last close to nine months. Here is the recipe:

1 box of Borax

1 box of Arm and Hammer washing soda

2 jars (small containers) of powdered oxyclean ( I used the SUN brand) 

2 small boxes of arm and hammer baking soda

3 bars of grated fels naptha soap (pink zote soap from Home depot works well too)

You should able to find all of this at Walmart. 

Mix it all together really well! My laundry room smells so fresh just from the detergent! I still use fabric softener just because I like our clothes to be extra soft.